Tuesday, October 7, 2014

9/30/14

As I lay here, back in the bunk beds of Horn Field Campus, my emotions are everywhere. I thought that I couldn’t wait to have a free day when we were back at Horn Field. I thought once we got to leave we were all going to go our separate ways, boy was wrong. I didn’t want to separate from the group at all. The first night off I was not really sure how I felt. I am not sure if I was feeling depressed, but I was not sad and was not exactly happy either. I could laugh and joke and smile during that, but on the inside I was confused. The next night went much better until the end and all I wanted was my new family. Even waking up without them was difficult. I had to fight through a lot of emotions, but I was learning form them as well. Everything that I had learned about myself in the past month was all flooding into my brain and making a lot of sense.
                Today I got to spend special time with my family and friends. It was the first time I had felt normal the whole time. The only thing was I couldn’t stop thinking about getting back to Horn Field and hitting the road. As I arrived back at Horn Field today ii knew I had made the right decisions in my life. I could feel the stress and anxiety leaving my body, my mind, and my life. There is honestly no better feeling than being thrown into a situation with complete strangers and in learning who they are; their quirks, personality dreams, and most importantly you learn about yourself. Then there is going to be that day when you leave them and you lose that bit of self-awareness, which I felt a bit of this weekend. It is going to be hard when we have really have to settle back into routine after routine Then we are going to be right back to where we started, starving for another adventure.


Cheyenne Wilson

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