Day 27

9/11/14

After taking a dip yesterday in the forty-degree Missinaibi water, my socks, boots, pants, underwear, coat, three layers of sweaters, bra, mittens, and rain gear are all wet. Maybe not a problem for you all at home with warm homes and dryers, but for us there is no warmth but body warmth. I wish I could take a hairdryer to my undergarments, get them nice and toasty, but instead I lay in my sleeping bag filled with damp socks and fleece attempting to evaporate some of that moisture. “But Cassidy,” you say, “just hang it out to dry. Let the sun do his job.” Well, friends, the rain and terrible weather here is RELENTLESS. There is no hanging my clothes out to dry, but rather hanging my clothes out to wash them. Did you also know that a fire must be at least 50 feet from any tarp or tent? Our fire only lasted about 10 minutes before our lovely instructor made us “put it out” due to it being only around 7 feet from our sleeping bags- regardless of the 45 minutes it took to gather enough dry material in the entire Ontario rainforest to supply a 10 minute fire.

We are in better spirits today, surprisingly enough. The rain let up after just over 12 hours of off and on mist the previous day; enough time for us to actually get out of our damp sleeping bags to make ourselves a brunch of vegetarian chili. The food here really is great, considering the dehydrated mess that it is. I’ve learned to give it an entirely different meaning. You eat for enjoyment while we eat for warmth. We eat for energy. I am putting butter in my hot chocolate and spreading peanut butter on the cheese I have left so that I can make it through the day. Just as any backcountry experience, an expedition runs on its stomach.

These next few days are not getting any easier. I have found myself pushing harder than ever before to look past how cold my fingers are or how painfully numb my toes are because the top priority of mine is getting off this stinkin’ river and into some warm dry clothes. This is the one thing you can’t prepare yourself for. You can only hope for a good mindset and ideal weather. The rest is on you to push through any boundary of comfort you’ve built up for yourself. ECOEE is more than just a class. It is more than just a minor. This is my life, now. Why I thought my life was hard before ECOEE, I have no idea. I look at these rapids ahead of us with bigger fears than I have ever known in my life. At least I can pretend that somewhere down the road it will all be worth it.

Cassidy Depoy